Stuff My Kids Say

My children humor me in the things that come out of their mouths! At some point, the funny quotes will wane. But for now, I enjoy keeping track of their hilarious sayings.

“What do you mean dinosaurs are extinct? Does that mean they smell?” Balance, 1/5/14

Me: “Wow, this hole in my jeans is getting bigger and bigger”. Balance: “That’s because you’re getting bigger and bigger. But I love you just the way you are.” 12/13/13

I decided to teach Balance how to do a cartwheel on day. After doing one myself to show her how, she asked with an astonished look on her face, “How do you STILL know how to do that?!” 12/9/13

I told King his behavior was making me sad. He yells, “No! You’re supposed to be happy!” 12/6/13

King  tried to jump rope and was not quite getting it. He looks up at me and says, “I can’t do it! I need Special Agent Oso!”

King hid behind a door and when I walked by, he jumped out and yelled, “Supplies!” 11/24/13

After giving King the task to clean his room before he can watch TV, I hear him fighting with Balance. He comes down the stairs crying. I immediately ask him what’s wrong. He says, “Balance’s not listening. She won’t clean my room.” 11/10/13

King: “Can I have something to eat?” Me: “Sure! Do you want some quinoa?” King: “No! I want koala!” Me: “Here you go. Some quinoa.” King: “Yay! Koala!” 11/3/13

At Balance’s soccer practice, King turns to me and says: “I want to go home!” Me: “We will. You have to have patience”. King: “I don’t want patience!” 11/2/13

King’s version of This Old Man: “Mr. Man, he played three, he played knick knack on my leg…mr. Man, he played five, he played knick knack on my bees…mr. Man, he played seven, he played knick knack on my clouds.” 10/22/13

Me: C’mon King, you wanna come lay down with Mommy. King gives a blank stare. Balance: “Its a trick; don’t listen to her!” 9/8/13

On the way to school, King: “I don’t want to go to school; I want to go to Starbucks!” Balance: “True story!!” 8/29/13


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